I now have 6 stitches on my left side.. and prolly about 5 on my rear. Joy. I get the stitches out 1-11-06.

Doc decided to only take 2 moles off. He left the one on my upper right back shoulder. I go back 1-11-06 to get the stitches out. I can start calling next Wednesday for results.

Ok, I'm such a wuss. Everytime I talk about today's appointment, I cry. Dh wasn't going to go with me, till he asked again this morning, and I started crying again. I haven't eaten anything since yesterday, I had some eggs and a small french fry, but I can guarantee they are no longer in my stomach. I tried gingerale, but that doesn't help, also tried immodium, to no avail. Please, if anyone reads this, send positive thoughts and prayers for no evidence of melanoma during the pathology tests! IF any of these come back positive for melanoma stage 2 and above, we will not be able to have another child for 5 years. (because of the treatment I would have to do)

I'm scared shitless. Which I think is part of my problem. I'm actually causing myself stress. I'm giving myself the shits. I go tomorrow to have 3 moles removed, one by my choice, 2 by docs choice. The wait on the path reports will be the worse.

Emma's most FAVORITE pressy was from Santa! She just loves to get in her intellitainer to play!

HAPPY FIRST CHRISTMAS EMMA!! Mommy and Daddy love you SO much! Everytime I think of this as your first Christmas, and how much you have grown, I get tears in my eyes. I can't believe that you are almost 4 months old already. You are growing up so fast, and learning new things. I hope you have the most wonderful day today with all of your family!
I LOVE YOU!
Mommy

Family Time
YIKES! We need to focus more on this!

We can feel a tooth trying to come in for Emma! Too bad it's one of her k-9 teeth! :( OUCH! I feel so bad for her!

Anyways.. work... SUCKS! I want to live a pampered life... without having to work to earn that pampered life. Make sense? I would like to stay home with my daughter, to watch her grow up and change... however, I need to work to make pennies. And pennies it really is. I barely make anything at the school.. but yet, I'm doing everything that a teacher does. SUCKS! I should look in to going back to school to get my teaching certificate, but really don't want to. Why? I'm not really sure. It would make life easier for us.

My gawd, what is wrong with me? I'm sitting here ready to cry again because I have to go back to work! I was off 3/4 days last week with Emma because she really wasn't herself. I feel awful for working and leaving her. I'm envious of dh too. He's on his weekend and gets to spend the day with her now. I have to work. I'm working this weekend too. UGH! I really must finish this online stuff so that I can stay home some too. Once I get that up and running, I should be able to quit school. School is another thing that isn't making me happy anymore. I STILL don't know what I want to be when I grow up. The school thing is so hectic this year, it's no fun. I'm doing stuff I'm not suppose to be doing, and I don't want to hurt the kids. All I feel like I'm doing right now IS harming the kids. I don't know how to teach... and yet, that is what I'm doing at a BIG salary difference.

Emma is getting so big so fast! I can't believe it! Yesterday morning, she was holding her bottle for brief periods of time! The babysitter thinks that she may be teething. She's really taken to nawing on her fists, drolling tons, and her eating habits are out of whack, all of which can be associated with teething I've read. Most of her 3 month clothing is too short for the dearie. Her little pants look like clam diggers on her! I've gone to putting 6 months clothes on her so that her legs won't stick out in the cold!

We are going to Rocky Ridge tonight with Cori and Mackenzie to look at the Christmas lights. The one side of the park is all decorated! Can't wait!